Poor Parking

Look how this dipwit parked in front my house. No, this person was not visiting me.

I think my annoyance was out of proportion with the seriousness of the crime. It’s not like I couldn’t pull into my driveway.

But there was tons and tons of curb space available that did not partially block my driveway and the car was there for several hours. It had a big laminated sign taped to the driver’s side door that was one of those long affirmations about success and confidence that suggest to me, the driver was probably unstable.

I was irritated enough that I thought about knocking on neighbors’ doors to ask if that was their visitor and could they please move to a better spot. But then *I* would be that crazy neighbor having a snit fit when the car wasn’t hurting anyone and I’d look like an ass to the neighbor and the guest and even if they moved the car it wouldn’t be satisfying.

Then I thought about writing a note but I didn’t want to end up on passiveaggressivenotes.com. But then I thought I could take a photo and turn myself in to passiveagressivenotes.com because *that* would be satisfying.

While I was exercising I was trying to compose the perfect note with just the right mix of batshit insanity and goofy grammar. Could I work in an unnecessary apostrophe s? What color Sharpie would best get my point across?

Sadly, the car was gone before I could come up with something good.

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3 Responses to Poor Parking

  1. Kira says:

    I left a passive aggressive notes candidate on my neighbor’s door. Among other things, she leaves her cat in the hallway of the building where it is trapped and then pees. She claims her kids let it out there and she doesn’t notice. One day I came out adn it was sitting on my door mat and Lila tried to eat it (we were on our way out for a walk.) So I left her a note stating what had happened and please to not leave her cat in the hall. I bet she hates me, but it hadn’t happened since… Of course, she steals my deck furniture…

  2. Marvin says:

    I would say, slash her tires, but you wouldn’t want her to stay there in front of your house. Instead, waiting simply let the problem take care of itself.

  3. Lorelei says:

    OK, that site is now my new favorite site. Besides yours, of course.

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